Posts Tagged ‘self improvement’
All of us, no matter who we are, face persistent change and adjustment in life. Whether they are changes created externally, like those initiated by national and international events, or those triggered internally by personal maturation processes, or other adjustments required to life events such as the birth of a new baby, launching a new career, separation, divorce, or the death of a spouse.
Unfortunately, life never stands still and thus, neither can we.
Noted change management writer, William Bridges, has identified a simple three-step model for understanding and coping with the transitions in our lives:
1. Endings
I appreciate this model because it is one of the few that I’ve seen that recognizes that all changes – whether the “good” ones or the “bad” ones – start with something ending in our lives. Despite how much we might be excited about the new venture (e.g., starting college, new job, getting married, relocation), the transformation first of all requires that we forfeit something.
We almost always have to release the well-known, the everyday, and the comfortable. This might involve changes to existing relationships, relocating from a community where we’ve lived for most of our lives, giving up our established position of “authority” or being the “go-to” person at the office. Possibly we’ll have to leave a social network that we’ve had for our entire lives. Friends with whom we attended school. A big comfortable house, with a terrific backyard for entertaining, plenty of room for the kids and all their friends. Possibly it’s something as simple as a quick and easy commute to work.
But, regardless of the type of change in our lives, it’s a good bet that the first thing(s) that we’ll notice are the things we are having to bid farewell.
2. Neutral Zone
The next phase of the process is I think the most difficult one. We’ve walked away from all the accepted, safe, comfortable, everyday things that we’ve trusted to expedite our every day decision-making processes, friends we can share our ups and downs with. We’ve had to release all the tried and true “safety nets” we’ve integrated into our lives: the insurance agent we’ve come to rely upon, our child’s teacher that we’ve been able to have some really good parent-teacher conversations with, the place of worship where we’ve become well established and have a solid social network.
The Neutral Zone is the time where all the “old stuff” has to be left behind, but the required new support structures haven’t yet been created, or if built, they are still still being firmed up and rather fragile.
Time in the Neutral Zone can be rather intimidating as you live in a state of novelty, ambiguity and uncertainty. But determination and perseverence are the attitudes essential to a successful trip through the Neutral Zone.
3. Beginnings
Slowly, over time, we begin to get things put in place for our new venture. If we’ve just started college, we’ve found all our classes, met the instructors, made some friends, and perhaps joined a fraternity, sorority or the tennis team. If beginning a new job, we’ve overcome the initial shock of being the new kid on the block, to having a definite role to perform, and we’ve gained knowledge and job competence. We’ve met our managers and many of our colleagues (perhaps we’re no longer the “newest” kid on the block). We’ve probably found a new home or apartment, unpacked most (if not all) the boxes. We know where the best grocery stores, drug stores, department stores, car repair shops, beauty salons, and emergency clinics are located.
Things are gradually settling into a daily pattern, and life is becoming more stable – and more predictable every day (although it will never become absolutely static, or static).
We’re incorporating the change and growing into our new roles and adapting to our new location.
All this takes time. The worst thing you can do is expect that it will come to pass overnight – it won’t. Give yourself, and your family, enough time and space, to adapt to the change – and they will!
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Jesse had an awfully difficult time keeping a job. If truth be told, due to his sluggishness and lack of motivation, he was unemployed far more frequently than he was in a state of employment. And when he did get employment, he had an extremely hard time getting to work on time, he characteristically got less than positive performance assessments, and he called off sick so regularly that he regularly got fired just a few weeks after he started working. It almost goes without saying that one of the effects of Jesse’s appalling employment track record was the fact that he was virtually broke almost on an everyday basis.
Despite Jesse’s unacceptable employment track record and financial laxity, conversely, one way or another he made it a point to drink in an excessive manner much of the time.
So it came as no big jolt when Jesse got arrested for a fourth DWI. When he went to court, the magistrate explained to Jesse that his alcohol-related actions was disgraceful and, as a consequence, he was going to sentence Jesse to serve seven months incarcerated in jail.
Time While Locked Up In Jail To Think About The Adverse Effects of Excessive Drinking
During his time in jail, Jesse was required to learn more about alcohol facts, about the hurtful results of thoughtless drinking, and he was expected to get alcohol treatment. The magistrate underscored the fact that unless Jesse gets professional alcohol counseling and discovers how to live a life of abstinence, he will probably be spending a considerable amount of time in the local jail.
Jesse stated that he comprehended what the judge was declaring but he still stated that placement in the local jail was not the most realistic ruling. The judge saw things from an entirely different orientation and proclaimed that it was his professional duty to keep alcoholics off the streets who drink and drive and who receive one or more DUIs. To substantiate this assertion, the judge quoted some honored, comprehensively researched alcohol statistics that stressed some of the adverse consequences that are related to abusive drinking.
Although Jesse understood that he drank in an excessive and hazardous manner, he never felt that he was an alcohol addicted person. So it was a big bombshell when Jesse began having symptoms of alcohol withdrawal nearly three-and-a-half hours after going to jail.
To treat his alcohol withdrawals in a safe and secure manner, Jesse was transferred to an alcohol rehabilitation hospital for alcohol detoxification and then returned to the city jail. While in jail Jesse received alcohol rehabilitation but since he received this rehab as something that was imposed upon him, he failed to take ownership of his excessive and irresponsible drinking.
When his time in the local jail was finished, the judge without hesitation announced to Jesse that he would be under rigorous scrutiny and would be required to take random breath alcohol tests.
Jessie’s Excessive and Hazardous Drinking Stops Him From Living in an Effective and Accountable Manner
After hearing how Jesse was unsuccessful in taking ownership of his drinking situation and how he unenthusiastically followed the therapy modus operandi while in the city jail, the judge knew that it was just a matter of time before he would be seeing Jesse once again in court about his irresponsible and hazardous drinking behavior. As the judge thought about Jesse’s situation, he couldn’t help but think about how some individuals never figure things out and learn how to live in a mature and effective manner.
Jesse had an exceptionally difficult time maintaining a job. As a matter of fact, due to his lethargy and lack of motivation, he was jobless far more frequently than he was employed. And when he did get a job, he had an exceedingly difficult time getting to work when his shift started, he typically received less than great performance evaluations, and he called off sick so regularly that he regularly got fired two or three weeks after he began working. To no one’s disbelief, one of the results of Jesse’s poor employment track record was the fact that he was virtually broke on a day-to-day basis.
Despite Jesse’s less than acceptable work track record and financial misconduct, on the other hand, one way or another he made it his business to drink in an irresponsible manner on a daily basis.
So it came as no big shock when Jesse got a second DUI. When he went before the court, the judge clearly stated to Jesse that his alcohol-related actions was terrible and, as a result, he was going to sentence Jesse to spend seven months locked up in jail.
Time In Jail To Think About The Devastating Consequences of Hazardous and Abusive Drinking
During his time behind bars, Jesse was required to learn more about alcohol facts, about the harmful effects of irresponsible drinking, and he was required to get alcohol treatment. The magistrate accentuated the fact that unless Jesse gets professional alcohol therapy and discovers how to live an alcohol-free life, he will more likely than not be spending a lot more time placed behind bars.
Jesse stated that he comprehended what the magistrate was uttering but he still proclaimed that placement in the city jail was not the best punishment. The judge saw things from an entirely different perspective and claimed that it was his duty to keep alcohol addicted people off the streets who drive under the influence and who get arrested for a DWI. To corroborate this perspective, the judge quoted some respected, highly researched alcohol statistics that underscored some of the devastating consequences that are correlated with irresponsible drinking.
Although Jesse realized that he drank in a hazardous and irresponsible manner, he never felt that he was a person who was dependent on alcohol. So it was quite a surprise when Jesse started to experience alcohol withdrawal symptoms approximately five hours after going to jail.
To manage his alcohol withdrawals in a safe manner, Jesse was transferred to an alcohol rehab hospital for alcohol detoxification and then brought back to jail. While in jail Jesse got alcohol rehab but since he got this treatment as something that was forced upon him, he did not take ownership of his abusive and hazardous drinking.
When his time behind bars was finished, the magistrate stated to Jesse that he would be under strict surveillance and would be required to take periodic urine alcohol tests.
Jessie’s Excessive and Irresponsible Drinking Stops Him From Living in a Productive and Effective Manner
After hearing how Jesse was unsuccessful in taking ownership of his drinking problem and how he unenthusiastically followed the therapy policy and procedures while in the local jail, the judge knew that it was just a matter of time before he would be seeing Jesse once again in court about his irresponsible and excessive drinking behavior. As the judge thought about Jesse’s situation, he couldn’t help but think about how some individuals never use common sense and learn how to live in a responsible and accountable manner.
Jesse had an exceptionally difficult time keeping a job. To be sure, due to his lassitude and lack of incentive, he was out of a job far more frequently than he was in work. And when he did get employment, he had an exceptionally hard time getting to work when his shift began, he regularly got less than satisfactory performance evaluations, and he called off sick so often that he usually got fired three or four weeks after he began working. Not surprisingly, one of the effects of Jesse’s shameful work record was the fact that he was without much money from day-to-day.
Regardless of Jesse’s less than great work track record and financial disregard, however, by some means he made it a point to drink a great deal on a daily basis.
So it came as no big surprise when Jesse received a fourth DWI. When he went before the court, the magistrate stated to Jesse that his alcohol-related behavior was awful and, consequently, he was going to sentence Jesse to serve ten months in the municipal jail.
Time Behind Bars To Reflect On The Unhealthy Results of Excessive Drinking
During his time behind bars, Jesse was required to learn more about alcohol facts, about the negative consequences of hazardous drinking, and he was expected to get alcohol rehab. The judge underscored the fact that unless Jesse receives professional alcohol rehab and learns how to live a life of sobriety, he will more likely than not be spending quite a bit of his time imprisoned.
Jesse said that he understood what the judge was proclaiming but he still proclaimed that incarceration was not the best decision. The magistrate saw things from an entirely different vantage point and declared that it was his obligation to keep alcohol addicted people off the streets who drink and drive and who get one or more DUIs. To give credibility to this assertion, the judge quoted some long-standing, extensively researched alcohol statistics that highlighted some of the devastating results that are associated with excessive and irresponsible drinking.
Although Jesse understood that he drank in an irresponsible manner, he never believed that he was a person who was dependent on alcohol. So it was a big bombshell when Jesse began suffering from alcohol withdrawals around seven-and-a-half after getting locked up in the local jail.
To treat his symptoms of alcohol withdrawal in a safe and secure manner, Jesse was taken to a drug and alcohol rehab hospital for alcohol detoxification and then brought back to jail. While locked up in the city jail Jesse got alcohol counseling but because he received this therapy as something that was forced upon him, he did not take ownership of his careless drinking.
When his time in the municipal jail was completed, the judge without uncertainty told Jesse that he would be under strict scrutiny and would be required to take periodic random breathalyzer alcohol tests.
Jessie’s Irresponsible and Abusive Drinking Prevents Him From Living in a Mature and Responsible Manner
After hearing how Jesse was unsuccessful in taking ownership of his drinking situation and how he halfheartedly followed the treatment protocol while behind bars, the magistrate knew that it was just a matter of time before he would be seeing Jesse once again in court about his hazardous drinking behavior. As the judge reflected on Jesse’s situation, he couldn’t help but think about how some people never use their brain and discover how to live in a mature and responsible manner.
Jesse had an exceptionally difficult time keeping a job. Indeed, because of his indolence and lack of motivation, he was without a job far more frequently than he was in work. And when he did secure a job, he had an extremely hard time getting to work when his shift started, he usually received less than acceptable performance assessments, and he called off sick so consistently that he almost always got fired a few weeks after he began working. Not surprisingly, one of the effects of Jesse’s terrible employment track record was the fact that he was just about flat broke almost on an everyday basis.
Despite Jesse’s less than optimal employment record and financial negligence, nevertheless, by some means he made it his business to drink heavily on a daily basis.
So it came as no big surprise when Jesse received a second DUI. When he went before the court, the judge clearly stated to Jesse that his alcohol-related actions was deplorable and, as a consequence, he was going to sentence Jesse to serve eleven months incarcerated in jail.
Time In The City Jail To Reflect On The Damaging Consequences of Abusive and Excessive Drinking
During his time in the municipal jail, Jesse was expected to learn more about alcohol facts, about the damaging results of abusive drinking, and he was required to get alcohol counseling. The magistrate accentuated the fact that unless Jesse receives professional alcohol counseling and learns how to live an alcohol-free life, he will most likely be spending a lot more time in the city jail.
Jesse said that he grasped what the magistrate was proclaiming but he still stated that placement in the county jail was not the correct response. The judge saw things from an entirely different orientation and asserted that it was his job to keep alcohol dependent people off the streets who drive under the influence and who get one or more DWIs. To support this statement, the judge listed some long-standing, comprehensively researched alcohol statistics that emphasized some of the destructive outcomes that are related to hazardous drinking.
Even though Jesse comprehended that he drank in an abusive manner, he never felt that he was a person who was dependent on alcohol. So it was a rude awakening when Jesse started to have alcohol withdrawal symptoms about six-and-a-half hours after getting placed behind bars.
To deal with his alcohol withdrawals in a harm free manner, Jesse was life flighted to a drug and alcohol rehab hospital for alcohol detoxification and then brought back to the city jail. While locked up in the municipal jail Jesse received alcohol rehab but since he received this rehab as something that was forced upon him, he did not take ownership of his careless drinking.
When his time in the local jail was finished, the judge without vacillation told Jesse that he would be under stringent surveillance and would be mandated to take random urine alcohol tests.
Jessie’s Hazardous and Excessive Drinking Stops Him From Living in a Mature and Adult Manner
After hearing how Jesse neglected to take ownership of his drinking circumstances and how he halfheartedly followed the therapy modus operandi while behind bars, the magistrate knew that it was only a matter of time before he would be seeing Jesse once again in court about his irresponsible and excessive drinking behavior. As the judge thought about Jesse’s situation, he couldn’t help but think about how some individuals never ”get it” and discover how to live in an accountable and effective manner.
Jesse had a particularly difficult time maintaining a job. In truth, because of his inactivity and lack of incentive, he was out of a job far more often than he was employed with a job. And when he did find a job, he had a particularly difficult time getting to work when his shift started, he frequently received less than positive performance assessments, and he called off sick so often that he typically got fired four or five weeks after he began working. To no one’s astonishment, one of the consequences of Jesse’s shameful work record was the fact that he was virtually without a dime much of the time.
Despite Jesse’s less than passing work track record and financial negligence, then again, somehow, someway he made it a point to drink in a hazardous manner much of the time.
So it came as no big jolt when Jesse received a fifth DWI. When he went before the court, the judge explained to Jesse that his alcohol-related conduct was awful and, consequently, he was going to sentence Jesse to serve five months in jail.
Time In The City Jail To Reflect On The Demoralizing Results of Irresponsible Drinking
During his time in the city jail, Jesse was expected to learn more about alcohol facts, about the devastating results of abusive and irresponsible drinking, and he was expected to get alcohol treatment. The judge emphasized the fact that unless Jesse gets professional alcohol therapy and learns how to live an alcohol-free life, he will quite possibly be spending a lot more time in the county jail.
Jesse stated that he understood what the judge was saying but he still thought that placement in the municipal jail was not the appropriate verdict. The judge saw things from an entirely different orientation and declared that it was his job to keep individuals off the streets who drive and drink and who get arrested for a DUI. To support this assertion, the magistrate listed some respected, highly researched alcohol statistics that stressed some of the adverse outcomes that are linked to irresponsible and hazardous drinking.
Even though Jesse understood that he drank in an excessive manner, he never felt that he was an individual who was addicted to alcohol. So it was a rude awakening when Jesse started to experience symptoms of alcohol withdrawal nearly six hours after getting locked up in the local jail.
To treat his alcohol withdrawals in a safe manner, Jesse was transferred to a rehab center for alcohol detoxification and then brought back to jail. While locked up in the city jail Jesse was given alcohol counseling but since he got this rehabilitation as something that was forced upon him, he neglected to take ownership of his irresponsible and excessive drinking.
When his time in the local jail was over, the judge without reservation announced to Jesse that he would be under careful observation and would be mandated to take random blood alcohol tests.
Jessie’s Excessive and Abusive Drinking Prevents Him From Living in a Mature Manner
After hearing how Jesse neglected to take ownership of his drinking circumstances and how he reluctantly followed the rehab modus operandi while in jail, the magistrate knew that it was basically a matter of time before he would be seeing Jesse once again in court about his hazardous and abusive drinking behavior. As the magistrate reflected on Jesse’s situation, he couldn’t help but think about how some people never “connect the dots” and discover how to live in an accountable and effective manner.
Be Proactive
Dreams, without actions, will never generate the kind of success you’re looking for.
Action is the precursor to success.
Becoming a success and realizing your dreams requires hard work – and action. Don’t let fear of failure keep you from taking action. Realizing one’s dreams is an individual responsibility.
Thomas Edison is remembered as a great inventor, but before he succeeded, he invented a lot of things that failed. Abraham Lincoln is remembered as a great President, but before he became President, he failed in business multiple times. Before Babe Ruth set the record for home runs, he struck out many times.
Just like Babe Ruth, we first must step up to the plate if we hope to hit that home run, or even get a base hit.
I’m sure Babe Ruth got free “walks” many times – but that was because he was such a great hitter that the pitchers were afraid to let him bat. In order to become successful, we’re going to have to do the legwork required to get there.
Don’t Procrastinate!
How many times have you heard someone say, “Don’t push me, I’ll do it later”, when all they ever do is sit on the couch, snooze, or play golf (the “Round Tu-It” trap).
But taking any action to realize their goals?
Oh, no, “I’ll get around to it.
Don’t waste your life sitting on the couch.
Your dreams are important to you, but the only way to realize them and realize success in life that you both want and deserve is to get up off the couch and take some action.
What could you do today to increase the chances that you’ll realize your dreams?
The FREE MaxPro Report & CD can be your roadmap to financial security.
Don’t wait for life to hand you success on a silver platter; it’s not likely to happen!
For the past eight years Natalie has been a registered nurse at a large urban hospital. As a professional nurse, she unmistakably knew what to tell her patients regarding their health concerns but in her off-duty life, nonetheless, she undeniably didn’t practice what she preached. For example, she occasionally drank in a hazardous and irresponsible manner, she didn’t exercise, she smoked at least a pack of cigarettes on an everyday basis, and she was almost twenty-one pounds overweight.
Natalie Gets Into A Car Accident, Fails An Alcohol Test, and Goes to The County Jail
One evening on her way to the hospital, Natalie got into a vehicle accident. Since the accident was her fault and since her speech was slurred when she talked, the arresting police officer gave her a breathalyzer test. In agreement with standard police operating procedures, when an individual becomes involved in a car accident and fails a sobriety test, the individual has to spend at least three hours in the local jail.
Actually, Natalie should have known better than to drive after she was drinking because she recently participated in an “alcohol abuse awareness” class at the hospital that centered on issues, statistics, and information about alcohol facts such as the following: binge drinking, DUIs, alcohol poisoning, and the primary differences between alcoholism and alcohol abuse.
Natalie is Quite Embarrassed About Her Vehicle Accident
It almost goes without saying that Natalie felt disgraced about her traffic accident. Not only this but she was embarrassed about the fact that the accident was her fault. And maybe worst of all, she was embarrassed about the fact that she was driving after she consumed a few drinks. As Natalie reflected on her situation, however, she knew that it could have been a lot worse because at her place of employment, when a alcohol blood test is given and failed, the individual has to go to compulsory alcohol rehab and is placed on non-pay status. This was merely one of the alcohol facts that was a reality at her place of employment and not much could be expected to change this fact.
Natalie’s Humiliation About Her Car Accident Motivates Her To Reevaluate Her Life and Make Some Significant and Healthy Alterations
In any case, Natalie’s disgrace about her automobile accident motivated her to reevaluate her life and make some remarkable and positive changes. First, she was going to abstain from drinking in a hazardous and abusive manner. Second, she was going to stop smoking. Third, she was going to go on a diet. And fourth, she was going to begin exercising.
As displeased as Natalie was about the entire car accident situation, she used this distressing experience as a trigger for positive change. Not only this but, she used her sorrowful experience as a wake up call that she had been neglecting her own health while she openly told others how to live in a more healthy manner. At last, she eventually saw the insincerity in her actions and finally determined that she would live her life as a positive example for other individuals.
For the past four years Natalie has been a licensed practical nurse at a large Veteran’s hospital. As a RN, she certainly knew what to tell her patients about their health difficulties but in her private life, nonetheless, she without a doubt didn’t practice what she preached. For instance, she typically drank in a hazardous and abusive manner, she frowned upon doing any physical exercise, she smoked roughly two packs of cigarettes per day, and she was approximately twenty-seven pounds overweight.
Natalie Gets Into A Vehicle Accident, Fails An Alcohol Test, and Goes to Jail
One morning on her way to the hospital, Natalie got into a vehicle accident. Since the accident was her fault and since her speech was slurred when she talked, the arresting highway patrolman had her take a breathalyzer test. According to standard police policy, when a person is involved in an automobile accident and fails a breath alcohol test, the person has to spend at least two hours in the community jail.
As a matter of fact, Natalie should have known better than to drive after she had been drinking because she recently went to an “alcohol awareness” class at the hospital that centered on issues, statistics, and information about alcohol facts such as the following: binge drinking, alcohol poisoning, DUIs, and the fundamental differences between alcohol dependency and alcohol abuse.
Natalie is Humiliated By Her Automobile Accident
Needless to say, Natalie was feeling a lot of shame about her car accident. In addition she was feeling quite a bit of shame about the fact that the accident was her fault. And maybe worst of all, she was humiliated by the fact that she was driving while under the influence. As Natalie wondered about her circumstance, nonetheless, she understood that it could have been far worse because at the hospital, when a blood alcohol test is administered and failed, the individual has to go to obligatory alcohol rehab and is placed on non-pay status. This was for all intents and purposes one of the alcohol facts that was a reality at her place of employment and not much could change this fact.
Natalie’s Disgrace About Her Car Accident Forces Her To Review Her Life and Make Some Significant and Beneficial Alterations
In any event, Natalie’s humiliation about her car accident motivated her to go over her life and make some important and beneficial changes. First, she was going to stop drinking in an excessive manner. Second, she was going to stop smoking. Third, she was going to go on a weight-loss diet. And fourth, she was going to begin exercising.
As disappointed as Natalie was about the entire car accident situation, she used this upsetting experience as a springboard for beneficial change. In addition, she used her negative experience as a real source of discovery that she had been neglecting her own health while she openly told others how to live in a more healthy manner. At last, she finally saw the double standard in her actions and made up her mind that she would live her life as a constructive source of hope for others.
For the past sixteen years Natalie has been a registered nurse at a small general hospital. As a licensed practical nurse, she undoubtedly knew what to tell her patients when it came to their health concerns but in her off-duty life, then again, she definitely didn’t practice what she preached. For example, she commonly drank in a hazardous and excessive manner, she didn’t exercise, she smoked nearly two packs of cigarettes on a daily basis, and she was more or less fifty-five pounds overweight.
Natalie Gets Into A Car Accident, Fails A Breath Alcohol Test, and Goes to The County Jail
One afternoon on her way to the hospital, Natalie got into an automobile accident. Due to the fact that the accident was her fault and because her speech was slurred when she talked, the arresting officer had her take a breathalyzer test. In agreement with standard police operating procedures, when a person becomes involved in a car accident and fails to pass a sobriety test, the individual has to spend at least three hours in the local jail.
In reality, Natalie should have known better than to drive after she was drinking because she recently participated in an “alcohol abuse awareness” class at the hospital that focused on information about alcohol facts such as the following: alcohol poisoning, binge drinking, DUIs, and the primary differences between alcohol abuse and alcohol dependency.
Natalie is Humiliated By Her Automobile Accident
It almost goes without saying that Natalie felt ashamed of her car accident. Furthermore, she experienced quite a bit of shame about the fact that the accident was her fault. And probably worst of all, she was humiliated by the fact that she was driving after she consumed a few drinks. As Natalie considered her circumstance, however, she comprehended that it could have been far worse because at her place of employment, when a blood alcohol test is given and failed, the individual has to go to compulsory alcohol treatment and is placed on non-pay status. This was simply one of the alcohol facts that was a reality at the hospital and not much could change this fact.
Natalie’s Disgrace About Her Traffic Accident Forces Her To Go Over Her Life and Make Some Noteworthy and Healthy Alterations
In any event, Natalie’s disgrace about her traffic accident helped persuade her to go over her life and make some important and healthy alterations. First, she was going to stop drinking in an irresponsible and hazardous manner. Second, she was going to stop smoking. Third, she was going to go on a strict diet. And fourth, she was going to begin exercising.
As upset as Natalie was about the entire automobile accident situation, she used this heartrending experience as a springboard for healthy change. What is more, she used her negative experience as a realization that she had been failing to address her own health while she openly told others how to live in a more healthy manner. After all had been said and done, she finally saw the duplicity in her actions and decided that she would live her life as a positive source of motivation for other individuals.