Posts Tagged ‘drug addiction’
How can we give drug addiction help to addicts who are struggling with addiction?
The real secret to this lies in empowering the drug addict to take control of their own life. In what way can we do that? It is a hard lesson to learn, but we cannot directly control another person, no matter how badly we want for them to not self destruct. Addicts have a tendency to do that and it can be extremely difficult to help them when they are resistant to change.
The first thing you will want to do when trying to help an addict is to examine your own behavior. Are you enabling them to go further down the road of addiction indirectly due to your own behaviors? If this is the case then you should consider changing your own actions first so that you’re not part of the problem. For example, if their drug use lands them in jail, and you automatically bail them out of jail, then you are probably enabling them. How? Because you are denying them the natural consequences of their using.
If you are “putting pillows under them” when they screw up, then you might actually be contributing to their ongoing use of drugs instead of helping them to make a decision for change. Another situation might be when they are at a party all night and get completely wasted and you end up covering their bases for them by calling off at their job. Doing these things might seem like the right thing to do, but in fact you might be damaging their chances at getting clean. If they are going to change their behavior in the long run then they are going to have to fall down and skin their knee a few times.
The moment of surrender is when the addict is willing to accept help on someone else’s terms. This is when you know that the drug addict is ready for change because they will no longer try to deceive you or trick you by asking for “help”. When they ask you for help in the form of guidance and direction about how to live, then you know they are ready for real change.
Pushing the addict to this point is difficult and there is not a whole lot a person can do to induce the state of surrender. The important thing is that you stop enabling them and this will allow them to reach the point of surrender on their own. The less your step in and rescue them and try to “help” them the quicker they will get there.
If you or someone you know needs alcoholism help then you might want to consider taking action. So what is the ideal action to take? In my opinion the ideal siutation is for the struggling alcoholic to find a rehab center that has a professional detox area and get checked in. This is the best course of action for a number of reasons:
1) Safety – it is actually very dangerous to stop drinking alcohol and in fact the withdrawal from alcohol can kill a person. This might sound crazy but it is safer to drink than it is to just stop suddenly without any medical support. Therefore the best thing you can do is to get to a medical facility where you can come off the alcohol in a safe environment.
2) Support – there is a ton of support to be had in a residential treatment center and this will come from the other people who are there trying to accomplish the same feat as you are. Having peer support in recovery is huge because we help each other to stay sober through sharing our experience and strength with each other.
3) Aftercare – most drug rehab centers don’t just let you go without some sort of follow up plan in place. This plan might include long term treatment, counseling, or meeting attendance. Either way you’re bound to receive some extra help and knowledge about how to overcome alcoholism when you check out of treatment.
And what if an alcoholic is not ready to attend rehab? If this is true then there’s not much to be done about it. In some countries or states there is the possibility of committing an alcoholic to rehab but this can create ill feelings and might actually backfire in the end. The better option in this is case is normally to offer treatment to someone and let them know that the option is available when they are ready to change.
The best way to help an alcoholic is through modifying your own behavior, not attempting to control theirs. This means that you do not try to control or manipulate them. Do not try to beg them to stop drinking. Do not threaten them or shame them or engage with angry arguments with them. None of these concepts help much. At best these ploys will create false hope before they fail to work. At worst they make the drinker dive deeper into addiction and isolation. If you’ve made it to this breaking point then you’ll want to know how can I help an alcoholic?
The first idea for you to grasp in attempting to help the alcoholic is that they are eventually going to make a decision to change for themselves, or they will not change at all. What you must understand is that the choice has to be theirs. You and others cannot take this crucial step for them. Not you, not a jail cell, not their parents, nobody.
The second thing that you need to come to grips with is that change for the typical alcoholic is generally prompted by pain and misery. Unfortunately this is the way it has to be. The alcoholic will eventually see that they’ve had enough chaos and despair on their journey and make a choice to do something different. This is the only driving force that makes real change. You could promise them a life of paradise if they quit drinking and this will do nothing to motivate them. The motivation has to come from pain and fear and misery.
Given these two ideas, you should be able to see where this is going. The most critical concept in working with a struggling alcoholic is that you should not attempt to deprive them of their misery. The struggling alcoholic is caught in a cycle of both good times and bad times with their drinking episodes, and you should do your best to get out of the way and allow them to face their own consequences. For example, if an alcoholic gets loaded on the weekends and can’t make it to work on Monday morning, they might lose their job. Let them lose it. Do not attempt to cover for them or help them to keep their life held together. This is part of their pain and you should not deny them of it. Doing so will keep them trapped in the cycle of alcoholism. Let them lose it experience their misery and they just might find recovery in the future. This is probably the best way to really help an alcoholic.
Beating addiction is a process and a journey, not a one-time occurence that just suddenly happens. Any recovering alcoholic or addict will tell you that overcoming addiction is a process that unfolds before you for the rest of your life. But what exactly does this process entail, and how can we go about pursuing it successfully?
Before you can make progress in recovery and begin to change, you will need to surrender fully and ask for help. What does this really point to?
It means you have to stop fighting with yourself in terms of trying to control your use. You have to give up the idea that you might one day be able to drink or use drugs like a normal person can. If you are hanging on to the idea that one day you might be able to control your drinking or drugging and thus use successfully, then you are setting yourself up for failure.
Surrender is a process. It just happens suddenly; I don’t really believe that you can make it happen by your own force of will. Most people would say you have to “hit bottom” first. If you are still having fun with drinking and drugging, then chances are not good that you can surrender to the disease. It is only after going through lots of miserable life experiences with drinking that surrender becomes an option. It is only when the fun is all over that an alcoholic might think about the possibility of surrender.
Because addiction attacks a person’s mind, body, and spirit, the solution must also address each of these areas of your life. That is what makes the holistic method of healing so effective in recovery. So frequently in recovery I have watched struggling alcoholics focus too strongly on one area of recovery while not paying any attention to the others. This usually produces a slide back into relapse. Beating addiction demands a more in-depth approach.
A holistic solution for recovery addresses these issues. You stop dumping booze and chemicals into your body and your overall health starts to improve because of this. At the same time a successful recovery program will push you to grow spiritually. You will make growth and progress both emotionally, socially, and spiritually as you make new connections in sobriety.
For the true alcoholic, the idea that they can just stop drinking is no light matter. Given that there are a number of different methods to stop, which are most effective in most cases?
1) Willpower – This is essentially the same as not using any technique at all, but only relying on one’s own willpower to avoid picking up another drink. Of course this has been attempted by numerous drunks over the years and time and time again we prove to ourselves that we cannot quit successfully without serious help. Ever.
2) AVRT – this stands for “Addictive Voice Recognition Technique,” so this is essentially an example of a cognitive therapy for quitting drinking. The trick is to realize when your “addictive voice” kicks in and realize that it is only your addiction talking to you and not your true self. The you can deny the addictive voice once you are aware of it and can actively respond to it.
There are other therapies out there that are similar to this, each with the concept that we can change up our thinking in order to change our behavior. These types of therapies probably do work for some people, but for the vast majority of alcoholics, cognitive therapies are insufficient to solve their problem.
3) AA – Twelve step programs are probably the most widespread solution for alcoholism, and because of this, they offer the most amount of hope and the most realistic solution for most people in most situations. Of course there are some pitfalls and downsides to Alcoholics Anonymous as well. For one thing–while it is difficult to find accurate data regarding this–the success rate in AA is probably somewhere in the range of 3 to 10 percent. To be fair, though, no other treatment method seems to offer substantially better numbers than this, and AA certainly has helped a lot of those who wanted to know how to stop drinking.
The problem is not that AA doesn’t work for people, but only that it does not work for the majority and if it does then it usually requires a supplemental strategy. The best solution for sobriety is an integrated strategy that considers every aspect and dimension of the alcoholic person. This is what we might call the creative theory of recovery in action. Finding your way to this solution requires a holistic approach if you want to stop drinking.
If you or someone you know needs help with alcoholism then you might want to consider taking action. So what is the most effective approach? In my opinion the ideal siutation is for the struggling alcoholic to find a rehab center that has a professional detox area and get checked in. This is the best course of action for a number of reasons:
1) Safety – it is actually very dangerous to stop drinking alcohol and in fact the withdrawal from alcohol can kill a person. This might sound counter-intuitive but it is actually safer to continue drinking alcohol than it is to go through detox unsupervised. So the best course of action is to find a full medical detox in a treatment center where they can safely bring you down off the alcohol and prevent any seizures.
2) Support – there is tremendous benefit to the peer networking that occurs in a rehab center and this is derived from being in there with others who are all trying to do what you are. Having peers in early recovery who are on the same path as you are is very important because you can learn so much from each other.
3) Aftercare – most drug rehab centers don’t just let you go without some sort of follow up plan in place. This plan could consist of going to a long term treatment center, using one on one therapy sessions, or simply going to AA meetings. Either way you are going to get some additional guidance and help in how to stay sober after you leave the facility.
What if someone is not willing to go to treatment? If this is the case then there is not much you can generally do. In some countries or states there is the possibility of committing an alcoholic to rehab but this can create ill feelings and might actually backfire in the end. The better option in this is case is normally to offer treatment to someone and let them know that the option is available when they are ready to change.
How can we give addiction help to addicts who are struggling with addiction?
The real secret to this is all about encouraging the struggling addict to become enthusiastic about their own life in recovery. But how can we actually do that? It can be a hard truth to accept, but we can’t really convince another person to change, no matter how much we desire for them to be clean. Addicts have a tendency to do that and it can be extremely difficult to help them when they are resistant to change.
The first step when it comes to helping a drug addict is to first look at your own actions when it comes to their drug use and it’s consequences. Are you enabling them to go further down the road of addiction indirectly due to your own behaviors? If so then you might want to take a look at what you’ve been doing to enable the person and seek to change those actions so that you’re not holding them back in any way. For example, if they are drinking or using and they end up in legal trouble over it, and you are the one who is bailing them out of jail all the time, then this is enabling behavior on your part. How? Because you are denying them the natural consequences of their using.
If you are “putting pillows under them” when they screw up, then you might actually be contributing to their ongoing use of drugs instead of helping them to make a decision for change. Another example might be if they are out all evening drinking or using and you call in to work for them the next day to cover for them. Doing these actions might seem beneficial to you, but in fact you’re probably hurting their chances for success in recovery. If real change is going to occur in their life then they are going to have to suffer through some ill effects of their using at some point.
The moment of surrender is when the addict is willing to accept help on someone else’s terms. This is when you know that the drug addict is ready for change because they will no longer try to deceive you or trick you by asking for “help”. When they ask for help and also ask for direction, then they are ready to make a real change in their life.
Getting the addict to this point is not easy and there isn’t much that you can do that will directly push them towards the point of surrender. The important part is that you no longer enable the addict and therefore allow them to hit bottom. The less your step in and rescue them and try to “help” them the quicker they will get there.